Well this is FABULOUS. My sister has been helping me out lately, trying to make arrangements for things - invitations, rehearsal dinner, etc- and to do so, she's been in contact with Batman's dad. Somehow, Batman's mom got a hold of my email address. DO NOT WANT.
I'm already sending back over 3000.00 to her because I'm not going to accept a check with the notion that if I use that money I'm obligated to use it the way she sees fit. I have already purchased a dress I like very much thanks, and I also love my jewelry. Just because it's not what you like doesn't mean I'm about to change it all TWO MONTHS BEFORE MY WEDDING.
I'm not really angry at this woman- I don't want to waste the mental energy. I'm mostly sad for her that she has such control issues. The thing I dislike though, is that hey, I'm getting married. I know there is stress involved in pulling off a giant party (heck, I helped cater an even of 600+ last weekend) but overall, I should be happy about things! Really, just a month ago, my heart overflowed with peace and goodwill towards men. I made friends with people I had previously stopped talking to. I helped out friends when I could. All was well with the world. For someone to take that feeling away from me, not because something is actually wrong, but because they are being selfish and childish... that makes me upset. GRR.
Batman and his parents came for a visit in early October- and while I love Batman and spending time with him is great, it was one of the most stressful weekends in my life. Both he and I were wiped out and had to take a day off afterwards- that's how bad it was. Batman's mom remains oblivious to this fact.
Since that time she has:
1. Given my mother's cell phone number to people and had them call her
2. Called my mother repeatedly
3. Sent me diet pills
4. Sent me more photos of her dress and her wedding with the implication that I should have wedding like hers
5. Sent me money to pay for a band and a new dress (WTF?) because if you don't have a first waltz it's not a real wedding (I jokingly but not really jokingly told her that the state of Texas does not require a dance for a legal wedding)
and goodness only knows what else. She also sent me 50.00 which I promptle handed over to a worthy cause. (MEK) Any other cash will likely meet a similar fate. Child's Play is coming up.
LET'S LOOK AT THE EMAIL!
Dear [Catwoman's] family,
Rehersal Dinner:
I prefer a place with a private room & audio visual capabilities. [these people are stuck on a dvd powerpoint slideshow, despite the fact that neither Batman nor I are interested. Also, as a cosplayer, I have no recent photos where I'm not dressed like an idiot.]
silver fox - good - could you call?
ruth chris -good
What type of place is the Reatta ( would you please call & ask if they have a private room)
Any other ideas? also,
Do you have musicians/ vocalists for the ceremony?
Have you hired musicians / band for the ceremony & reception?
Can they play any Jewish wedding music? Would separate men/ women dancing be OK? [Neither Batman nor I are interested in dancing at the reception, and the site isn't really equipped for it. We have said this multiple times. FLAT OUT. She refuses to listen.]
Klezmer music?
Please be aware that intermarriages are prohibited in our Jewish religion. I was required to study for 1 year for a conversion to Judaism.
My husband would only have married Jewish. All men in the [Batman] family have married Jewish & given their sons a BRIS and a Bar Mitzvah. Our Rabbi - Rabbi Davis [Phone Number] - will be back wed, thurs, fri am.
IMPORTANT -[Catwoman] is required to have at least 8 1 hr. meetings with a traditional Rabbi, before I will consent to paying for this dinner.[Shoot, we can just go get Wendy's then! I just point this out as an example of her using money as a weapon/leverage. You know what, yeah- my family doesn't have a lot of money. Oh well. My sister still got married and it was just great and there wasn't much help from the groom's family because they live in another country. But to act like we're going to go OH NOES!!!!1 WE MUST DO WHAT YOU WANT BECAUSE OF MONEY!!! I'm sorry, I don't operate that way.] It is enjoyable to learn about the Jewish religion & culture. [No sarcasm from me- I am sure it is if you are interested. But seeing as Batman himself is not interested, it would be silly for me to do something just to keep up appearances.] [Catwoman], please call for apts. with local Dallas Rabbi [Name] [Phone]. I will provide all taxi fees.
Do you have a driver's license, yet. It is very important to do so, for your own safety. [People never die in cars. Only in buses and while crossing the street.]
There are strict rules requiring a jewish marriage, that have been completely ignored.[Well maybe you should think about why your son had no interest in pursuing such a marriage?[ No Saturday weddings are allowed among religious Jews.[But magically, she found a Rabbi to officiate on a Saturday morning.]
I am not allowed to invite anyone from the greater Jewish community[Woman, I could make a list of the things you are not *allowed* to do- but that has never stopped you before!] ( aprox. 100 guests that will not come & will not send a gift)[Well, I AM poor. I am only getting married for the presents.] [Batman] will be denied almost all birthright honors in the Temple, he will be denied rights to read from the Torah, restricted inheritance...if he marries an non-jewish girl.
You simply do not understand the anguish on our end.
I have not had an opportunity to discuss major decisions, such as Jewish holidays, raising children etc., jewish status of children.[Batman has no interest in raising his children in a Jewish traditio--- no, y'know what? I'm not even gonna try anymore.]
There is a possibility that my husband will not attend.[THIS IS REALLY INTERESTING TO ME- BECAUSE HE HAS MADE IT CLEAR THAT HE DOESN'T GIVE A CRAP.]
thank you for sending your e- mail. [I DID NOT! I THINK MY SISTER LEFT IT ON A CC AND I AM PISSED.]
I will still make a C.D. with your photos - please send a quickly, as possible.
Also, [Catwoman] must have a complete health & physical ( we sent money order)- we have a thyroid specialist friend, who is concerned she may have iodine deficiency,[WTF kind of doctor makes a diagnosis having NEVER SEEN the person???] hypothyroidism, possible goiter? She also needs a fasting blood glucose test. Must be treated now!
Has she been put on a weight -loss program? [I'm starting kickboxing ASAP.]
thank you for keeping in touch. We should have had these talks a year ago. [I'm hella glad we didn't. I couldn't take a year of this.]
sincerely, [mrs. doesn't capitalize anything properly]
Yeah so. Punch. With bears. I don't even know anymore.
Monday, October 26, 2009
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